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15 Non-Hormonal Birth Control Methods

Birth control.

Does your mind instinctively imagine a small plastic compact lined with small pills or maybe it’s a patch, injection or flexible ring that incorporates some sort of hormone that miraculously affects the body to regulate fertility? 

Hormonal birth control options are extremely effective and popular – you may even be using one right now – but perhaps you would like to learn about options that don’t include estrogen and/or progestin hormones.

This could be for many reasons. You may be attempting to lower the effects you are currently experiencing with a hormonal method such as weight fluctuation to depression or perhaps more serious effects such as liver damage or blood clots.

Perhaps you are trying to reduce the overall amount of hormone exposure in your life.

Or you may simply want to be aware of the options offered.

You’ll be interested to know that there are many non-hormonal options readily available, inexpensive and highly effective.

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Before proceeding to list the options – I would like to note that, above all, there is no one-size-fits-all birth control option. I know many women who have chosen a hormonal fertility control method and are very satisfied. That doesn’t mean they are wrong or they are making a terrible choice. I encourage every woman to make the choice that meets their own personal needs and wants.  

No matter what you personally choose, birth control allows women control and choice over their own sexual heath which pretty damn awesome.


IUD
Paragard Copper Intrauterine Device


How it works:
Paragard is a T-shaped non hormonal copper device inserted into the uterus by your doctor. The IUD works by interfering with the movement of the sperm inside the uterus and prevents it from joining an egg.  Sperm die within the uterus before they can fertilize the egg.

RIP sperm.


Success rate:
The copper IUD is more than 99% effective and prevents pregnancy for over a decade.


Pros:
Using a copper IUD is effective, reversible, and won't impact a woman's naturally occurring hormones.

This particular IUD can last up to 12 years before needing replaced. It might also protect against endometrial cancer.

This method is ideal for women who do not desire a pregnancy for an extended period of time. It also lends the convenience of not having to do anything on an ongoing basis.

No component of ParaGard contains latex for those that are concerned with allergies.

It can be used during breastfeeding.

Cons:
Using an IUD can increase the amount of bleeding a woman experiences during her period and may increase menstrual cramping.

Prescription is needed.

The common myth that they can cause infertility has not found merit. However, inserting an IUD while you have an STD could increase your chance of infertility.


The Sponge
The Today Sponge


How it works:
The sole brand available in the U.S. is The Today Sponge which is a plastic foam sponge that contains spermicide. The sponge covers the cervix while continuously releasing spermicide.

The sponge was removed from the U.S. market in 1994 due to manufacturing issues but finally re-introduced in Canada in March 2003 and in the U.S. in September 2005.

There is a polyester loop string located on the outer surface to assist in the removal of the sponge.  The sponge can be left in place for 24 hours, with no limit of how many times you can have sex during that time frame. However, for the spermicide to be effective, the sponge must be left in place for 6 hours after sex before it is removed.


Success rate:
Among women who have never given birth, the sponge is 91% effective and for those who have had children the sponge is about 80% effective.


Pros:
You can buy the sponge over the counter or even online. No prescription need.

You can also have sex as many times as you like during the first 24 hours of wearing it.

It can be used during breastfeeding.


Cons:
The sponge is somewhat costly (compared to condoms at least); a package of three can cost about $15 over the counter.

It can also be challenging to insert. Also women who use contraceptive sponges may have a risk of yeast infection and urinary tract infection if they are more prone to them to begin with.

A woman should be comfortable touching herself in order to insert and remove this barrier method correctly.



Male Condom
Trojan, Durex, Lifestyles, Crown


How it works:
Male condoms prevent sperm from entering the vagina via barrier method to reduce the probability of pregnancy and spreading sexually transmitted diseases.

Condoms are most often made from latex, but some are made from other materials such as polyurethane, polyisoprene, or lamb intestine.


Success rate:
If used correctly, condoms can be up to 98% effective against pregnancy.

As for lambskin condoms, they are generally effective as a contraceptive by blocking sperm, it has been presumed that they are likely less effective than latex in preventing the transmission of agents that cause STDs, because of pores in the material - however, no data exists that either confirms or denies this.


Pros:
Condoms are pretty simple to use, easy to get, and cheap.

They prevent STDs.

Condoms are widely available without a prescription at many drug and grocery stores. They come in different sizes, textures, flavors and colors, and spermicidal condoms are also available.

It can be used during breastfeeding.

No prescription need.


Cons:
They might dull sensation and interrupt intercourse. However, lambskin may provide a more "natural" sensation.

Some women or men may be allergic to latex, a material used in some condoms.

Male and female condoms should not be used together because the latex could tear.



Female Condom
Femidom


How it works:
The female condom (or femidom) is placed inside the vagina and collects semen when a man ejaculates via barrier method to reduce the probability of pregnancy and spreading sexually transmitted diseases.


Success rate:
If used correctly, only five out of 100 women will become pregnant (95% effective).


Pros:
This method protects against STDs.

The female condom is a great method for women because it gives them control and choice over their own sexual health; women can protect themselves when their partner does not want to use a male condom; female condoms may provide enhanced sensation for men as compared to male condoms.

They also come pre-lubricated with a non-spermicidal, silicone based lubricant.

No prescription need.


Cons:
It could slip into the vagina during intercourse, reduce feeling slightly, or cause some noise, much like the male condom.

Inserting the female condom is a skill that has to be learned and female condoms can be significantly more expensive than male condoms (upwards of 2 or 3 times the cost).

It can be a turn off to some users because the outer ring remains visible outside the vagina during sex.

A woman should be comfortable touching herself in order to insert and remove this barrier method correctly.




Diaphragm
Koro-Flex, Koromex, Ortho-Diaphragm

How it works:
The diaphragm is a dome shaped, rubber, flexible rimmed cup which is fitted by your doctor.

Before sex, a woman inserts the diaphragm creating a barrier to sperm.  For added protection, about a tablespoon of spermicide is used on the inside of the diaphragm in case an adventurous sperm makes it over the rim.

If a diaphragm is fitter correctly, a woman should not feel the diaphragm and should be able to wear it comfortably.  Your partner may feel the latex of the diaphragm but it should not cause discomfort.  The diaphragm may be inserted up to 6 hours before sex and it may be left in place for 24 hours after sex.

Success rate:
Of women who always use the diaphragm correctly, six out of 100 become pregnant (94%).

Spermicide cream/gel/jelly is recommended to increase effectiveness.


Pros:
It usually cannot be felt by your partner and can be inserted hours before sex which means there is no interruption during foreplay and sex. 

It can be used during breastfeeding, it is immediately effective and reversible.

Cons:
A diaphragm requires a fitting by your doctor (possibly even refitting).

It requires a prescription.

It should not be used during your period and can be difficult to insert-which you have to do each time you have sex.

A diaphragm may be pushed out of place by some penis sizes, heavy thrusting, and certain sexual positions.

A woman should be comfortable touching herself in order to insert and remove this barrier method correctly.


Cervical Cap
FemCap

How it works:
A cervical cap is a silicone cup inserted into the vagina to prevent pregnancy which can last up to two years.

FemCap is the only brand of cervical cap available in the United States today. It comes in 3 sizes and must be fit by a health care provider.



Success rate:
Of women who have never given birth, 14 out of 100 will become pregnant (86% effective). For those who have given vaginal birth, 29 out of 100 will become pregnant (71% effective).

Like the diaphragm, you should use spermicide cream/gel/jelly to increase effectiveness.


Pros:
It works similar to a diaphragm, and for $60-75, a cervical cap will last up to two years.  It usually cannot be felt by your partner and can be inserted before sex which means there is no interruption during sex. 

It can be used during breastfeeding, it is immediately effective and reversible.

Some say it is easier to remove compared to the diaphragm.

Cons:
Similar drawbacks as the diaphragm: it cannot be used during your period, might be a bit challenging to insert and does not protect against STDs.

It requires a prescription.

A woman should be comfortable touching herself in order to insert and remove this barrier method correctly.

The cervical cap must stay in place six hours after sex.



Spermicide
Conceptrol, Encare, Emko, Delfen Foam

How it works:
Spermicides are chemicals that kill sperm or stop them from moving, which you insert deep into the vagina right before sex.

It can be used along with other forms of birth control.

There are many different forms available including creams, film, foams, gels, and suppositories. Instructions on how to use a specific spermicide are provided in the box or can be obtained from your health care provider.

Spermicides are more effective if they are used with another barrier method.

Success rate:
When used alone, studies suggest that six to 26 percent of women will become pregnant (74% effective).

Even if you don't use another method along with spermicide, your chance of getting pregnant is much less than if you use no birth control at all.

Effectiveness generally decreases after one hour.

Pros:
Super easy to get and a rather inexpensive form of birth control that a woman can control.

Available without a prescription.

It can be inserted by a partner as part of foreplay.


Cons:
It is ideal to use spermicide along with another form of contraception.

If not used exactly as directed, spermicides may not form a good barrier over the cervix which, of course, may make the spermicide less effective.

Some women tend to complain that spermicides are messy or that they leak from their vaginas.

Spermicide may cause irritation to the penis or vagina.

Most spermicides contain nonoxynol-9 which carry certain risks. If it is used many times a day, or by people at risk for HIV, it may irritate tissue and increase the risk of HIV and other sexually transmitted infections.

The use of spermicide can make oral sex unpleasant for some partners. Additionally, continued use of spermicide can disrupt the vaginal lining.



Surgical Sterilization
Tubal ligation, Essure

How it works:
By sealing the fallopian tubes, surgical sterilization permanently prevents an egg from getting to the uterus.

Closing the tubes can be done in several ways. One way is by tying and cutting the tubes - this is termed tubal ligation. The fallopian tubes also can be sealed using an instrument with an electrical current. They also can be closed with clamps or rings.

In some cases, a small piece of the tube is removed.

In other cases, tiny inserts are put in the tubes. Tissue grows around them and blocks the tubes. The brand name for this type of sterilization is Essure. 

Success rate:
Sterilization is nearly 100 percent effective.

For every 1,000 women who have Essure, fewer than 3 will become pregnant.

For every 1,000 women who have traditional incision methods, about 5 will become pregnant.

Most kinds of sterilization for women are effective right away. But it takes about three months before Essure is effective.


Pros:
It allows a woman to enjoy sex without worrying about pregnancy.

Many women and men report that they have more sexual pleasure because they don't have to think about unwanted pregnancy anymore.

Most women still have normal periods.

Cons:
You might change your mind, plus it requires surgery.

Most women can be sterilized safely. But like any medical procedure, there are risks. One possible risk is that the tubes may reconnect by themselves - but this is rare.

When women get pregnant after being sterilized, about 1 out of 3 has a pregnancy that develops in a fallopian tube (ectopic pregnancy) which is serious and may be life threatening.

You should consider any possible life changes, such as divorce, remarriage, or death of children.



Vasectomy

How it works:
While this is technically birth control for men, if you're in a committed long-term relationship you might consider it.

During a vasectomy, a health care provider closes or blocks the tubes that carry sperm, making it impossible for sperm to travel out of the testes and make a woman pregnant.

To get a bit more technical, a vasectomy blocks each vas deferens and keeps sperm out of the seminal fluid. The sperm are absorbed by the body instead of being ejaculated. Without sperm, the "cum" (ejaculate) cannot cause pregnancy.

Average cost is $350 to $1,000.

Success rate:

Pros:
It lasts for life, and is less intrusive than female sterilization.

It also may be possible to reverse, although men should not count on that.

Cons:
You or he might change your mind.

It is not immediately effective because sperm remains beyond the blocked tubes for about 3 months. A simple test is performed - semen analysis - after 3 months to confirm there are no more sperm remaining.

Very rarely, tubes grow back together again and pregnancy may occur. This happens in about 1 out of 1,000 cases (this happened to a coworker of mine!).

Decreased sexual desire or an inability to have an erection occurs in 4 out of 1,000 cases. The most likely cause is emotional - there is no physical cause for sexual dysfunction associated with vasectomy.


Breastfeeding
Lactational Amenorrhea Method


How it works:
Breastfeeding can be used as birth control when, after giving birth, a woman breastfeeds her baby exclusively. That means the baby does not drink anything besides breast milk. The act of breastfeeding naturally changes a woman's hormones so that she does not become pregnant.

It can be highly effective for six months after delivery or until her period returns.


Success rate:
Effectiveness ranges from 98-99 percent.

Pros:
This method is free and no prescription required.

It reduces bleeding after delivery and is immediately effective.

Breastfeeding has many health advantages for the baby: (1) It decreases the likelihood of infection from germs in water or formula (2) increases body contact and enhances comfort for the child and bonding between mother and child (3) passes on some of the mother's antibodies to protect the baby from certain infections (4) protects against the development of allergies and may protect against the development of asthma (5) provides the best nutrition available

Cons:
Some women find it hard to exclusively breastfeed and not use any formula at all. If formula is given to the baby, the woman has a chance of getting pregnant again.

Breastfeeding may make a woman feel like her breasts are less sexual.


Lea's Shield

How it works:
One of the newer forms of non hormonal birth control, Lea's Shield is an oval device similar to a diaphragm made of silicon rubber and includes a loop which helps in removal.  The shield covers the cervix and is only made in one size so there is no fitting required.

The Lea's Shield is not held in place by the cervix (like the cap) or pubic bone (like the diaphragm) but rather by the vaginal wall. The size of the cervix and the length of the vagina do not play a role, thus the device does not need to be "fitted" by a doctor.

Lea's Shield is inserted much like a tampon. You simply squeeze the shield and push it as far as it will comfortably go. When inserted properly, you should not be able to feel it.

The shield has a flexible ring, which can be used to help with removal.

In the United States, this method is by prescription only.

Lea's Shield is usually used with a spermicide and must be left in place for eight hours after sex.

Success rate:


Pros:
Lea's Shield is composed entirely of medical-grade silicone rubber and thus it is non-allergenic.

The device is one-size-fits-all, washable, and reusable up to 6 months.

You can insert Lea's Shield anytime prior to sex (just place spermicide around the ring of the shield and push it into place). You can leave the shield in place for up to 40 hours after insertion.

It can be used during breastfeeding.

It is among the most inexpensive forms of birth control, costing about $65 per shield.

There is no interruption of foreplay - it can be inserted hours ahead of time.

Cons:
Similar drawbacks as the diaphragm: it cannot be used during your period and does not protect against STDs.

It also requires a prescription.

A woman should be comfortable touching herself in order to insert and remove this barrier method correctly.



Withdrawal
Pull Out Method

How it works:
A man who uses withdrawal will pull himself out of the vagina before ejaculation - the moment when semen spurts out. (skeet-skeet, sorry, I couldn’t help myself here)

This method may be the world's oldest way to practice birth control. About 35 million couples worldwide still rely on the withdrawal method.

Success rate:
With typical use, withdrawal is 73% effective. If used correctly and consistently withdrawal is 96% effective.

Withdrawal is not very effective because it is difficult to perform consistently and the pre-ejaculatory fluid may carry sperm into the vagina.

Withdrawal does not protect against STDs.

Pros:
Anyone can use withdrawal safely - there are no side effects.

No prescription is necessary.

It is free!

Cons:
Even if a man pulls out in time, pregnancy can still happen. Some experts believe that pre-ejaculate can pick up enough sperm left in the urethra from a previous ejaculation to cause pregnancy.

Couples who have great self-control, experience, and trust may use the pull out method more effectively.

This method is not recommended for teens and sexually inexperienced men because it takes lots of experience before a man can be sure to know when he's going to ejaculate



Fertility Awareness
Rhythm Method, Calendar Method, Natural Family Planning 

How it works:
Fertility awareness-based methods (FAMs) are ways to track ovulation (the release of a women’s egg) in order to prevent pregnancy.

FAMs work by keeping sperm out of the vagina in the days near ovulation, when a woman is most fertile and most likely to become pregnant.

There are a variety of ways to determine the days where a woman is most likely to get pregnant from unprotected sex: Temperature Method, Cervical Mucus Method, Calendar Method, Standard Days Method are a few.

To prevent pregnancy, women can abstain from vaginal intercourse on their fertile days or they may enjoy other kinds of foreplay instead of intercourse on their fertile days.

Success rate:
With typical use, Natural Family Planning is 80% effective. If used correctly, consistently, and all of the time, Natural Family Planning can be 98% effective.

Pros:
Cost is relatively small.

These methods are safe and can be stopped easily to plan a pregnancy.

Calendars, thermometers, and charts are easy to get.

Medication or a prescription is not needed.

Can be used during breastfeeding.

Cons:
How well fertility awareness-based methods work depends on both partners. That's why it is important for both to learn about the methods and support each other in their use.

Best for women who have regular twenty eight day cycles and can carefully monitor her fertility on a daily basis.

Fertility awareness-based methods may not work well if you take medicine that may affect reading the signs of these methods.



Abstinence
Just say no


How it works:
Abstinence is refraining from sexual activity.  

Success rate:
Used continuously, this method is 100% effective at preventing pregnancy and STDs.

Pros:
Abstinence is one of the safest ways to prevent pregnancy - there are no side effects.

It is free and prevents STDs

Cons:
People may find it difficult to abstain for long periods of time – becoming quite frisky.

This method will work best for those who choose it for religious or cultural reasons.



Outercourse



How it works:
For some people, outercourse is any sexual interaction without vaginal intercourse. For others, it is foreplay with no penetration at all - oral, anal, or vaginal such as stimulating each other with hands or rubbing.

It allows a couple to be more intimate and even have an orgasm with one another without having sex.


Success rate:
This method is nearly 100% effective at preventing pregnancy and STDs.


Pros:
Outercourse is simple, convenient and free.

It can help people better understand their bodies

This can be used when no other birth control methods are available.

Cons:
Both partners may let outercourse lead to intercourse without being ready to protect themselves against pregnancy.

People may find it difficult to abstain for long periods of time.




The above information has links throughout and the majority of information can be found at the following links:




50 Shades of Crazy-Staying Sane with Grey In Your Life

I think I can say in confidence that we all have wild-cards in our life.

Sometimes those wild cards present themselves in the form of an unexpected situation or a sudden change – One case in my life, it had emerged as a particularly thorny affiliation with an ex-friend (we’ll call her ‘M’ for the purposes of this post).

The influence of managing this particularly volatile circumstance in my life has undoubtedly filtered into some of my posts over the last few years -for example, my position on bullying (although this particular relationship definitely transcended that). All the same, I never thought publicly addressing the situation with ‘M’ would be a remarkably sound idea – although that never hindered her vocalization.

She had openly admitted on being violent toward herself (physically) and I knew that she was already aggressive to, not just me, but others as well (psychologically and emotionally). I didn’t want to make an already precarious situation worse – not to mention, she knew where I lived, where my children slept, what car I drove, where I worked…

So why mention this now – maybe because I feel like it can positively impact others going through something similar…

In retrospect, I did publicly touch upon the circumstance once, in a comment I posted (under the name ‘Amanda’) on a thread which was an seemingly failed attempt to explain and apologize for ‘M’s erratic behavior toward other young lady (apparently ‘M’ and another woman told a young mother who lost a child during birth that she murdered her own baby, although I do gather it would be quite challenging to absolve anyone of such remarks). However, this attempt at clarification ended up biting me in the ass nearly a year later when someone used the comment to gather information on ‘M’ for a random troll list which she now mistakenly insists I had a part it writing.

The individuals that wrote the material in this particular list think they are fighting the ‘good’ fight and I do grasp their perspective. However, I would like to make a case that if someone really wanted to help the victims of internet aggression, then it might be vastly more productive to foster places or online-spaces where there is acceptance and support – not, making a public list describing how horrible a person is or taking screen shots of someone’s conversation to illustrate their atrocities.

I understand the need to protect yourself when lines are crossed and you feel that real damage has been done – a person’s immediate response might be to retaliate even more maliciously. However, a wise person knows this is not how to cope with conflict in your life.

I’m not saying these people are, or are not, ‘trolls’.

What I am saying is I choose not to place effort into aggravating those matters. If I did have to collect a thought regarding this list, I would say it should be taken down – in fact, I did ask this and it was at the moderator’s discretion to remove the comment from the page.

I did what I could at the time and I move on.

Now onward forth.


Thriving Through the Fanatical

Managing people or events in your life that are dysfunctional has the ability to drain you, to fuel fear and implant anxiety…which, admittedly at one point in my life, I allowed it to negatively effect me. However, it also imparts the opportunity for personal development and growth.

I hope the following helps facilitate great progress in the conflict and struggles in your life (I know it did mine):


Release your burden.

Hate is restrictive and constricting, while the act of love and forgiveness is the ultimate release. 

From trivial upsets to significant loss, it is essential for a person’s own sanity to place effort (physically, emotionally, socially, mentally, and spiritually) into accepting situations in their life for what they are and to release any harmful and unconstructive connection we have to it.

Everything cannot go according to plan at all times and acceptance does not mean you approve of what is happening – it merely liberates a person from the constraints of a particular event that happened in the past (whether 5 minutes ago or 5 years ago). Because let’s face it, if it happened in the past then it cannot be changed no matter how much pain, fear or hate it produced.       

Acceptance is a person's assent to the reality of a situation, recognizing a situation without attempting to change it.

It is foreseeable that there will be people in our life that are addicted to acting in an insufferable manner, refusing to accept anything in their life that is not what they believe their life should look like.

While we can continue to the best of our ability to provide support and encouragement for people in our life, fortunately each one of us has the authority to make the choice not to participate in hatefulness and dysfunction. 

To quote Martin Luther King, “Hate is too big a burden to bear”.


Positive actions start with you.

Focusing on what a person hates does not resolve it – rather, it multiplies.

Try to appreciate that personal responsibility is a strength, not a weakness. Take ownership of your actions and recognize the impressive power of positive, compassionate acts.

Each person and situation in your life presents value – honor the importance of that even through the misery it/they may cause you.


Ask for help.

Ninety-five percent of the time, conflict is about feelings-not facts.

If there is a person in your life or a situation that is causing real distress, sometimes it is best to take the time and talk to someone who is not emotionally involved. This can be a touchstone to the pulse of something outside the insanity that this person/event is causing.

In my experience, this always places things in perspective. Many times, other people are going through bigger obstacles in their life and it makes the dysfunction occurring in my life seem insignificant.

****


No doubt, becoming fully aware of what is important in your life is paramount in dealing with difficult people and events.



"Our lives are not determined by what happens to us
but by how we react to what happens, not by what life brings to us,
but by the attitude we bring to life.

A positive attitude causes a chain reaction of positive thoughts, events, and outcomes.
It is a catalyst, a spark that creates extraordinary results."

The Epidural: Less Satisfying and More Painful Birth?


Pregnancy and birth are filled with many unpredictable features, whether this be your first go at the rodeo or 5th.

Pain experienced during labor is also unpredictable. Pain may be manageable without medication, or it may become severe and exhausting.

If you find yourself calling the United States your home, then you are among the majority if you opt for epidural pain relief during labor.

Ladies in the U.S. have fewer options for labor pain management than our counterparts in other industrialized nations (such as the UK and Canada). It is uncertain if the excessive use of epidural analgesia is a true preference in the US or if it is simply chosen because of the lack of other presented options.[*]

Interesting, none-the-less….

What is certain is that epidural use is nearly always an elective procedure. Although it can be a useful tool in supporting a laboring mother, the use of epidural medication expands the chance for complications, this does not occur in drastic numbers. Each family has their own comfort level with side effects and risk – what one family may consider safe, another may become uncomfortable. (you can learn more about risks associated with epidural use here and here) 

Everyday, devoted and loving soon-to-be mothers opt for epidural anesthesia pain relief during the birth of their babies.

I was among them, choosing an epidural with my first daughter because I thought it would help with pain and allow me to have a more enjoyable experience. In actuality, I experienced agonizing break-through pain and a cascade of interventions that I wasn’t anticipating (urinary catheterization, artificial rupture of membranes, internal fetal monitoring, use of synthetic oxytocin). 

Was my disillusionment with epidural anesthesia in the minority? 


Higher Pain Recall Among Those Opting for Epidural Analgesia


A remarkable finding from a longitudinal study (2009 BJOG) regarding women’s memory of labor pain found that mothers who opted for epidural analgesia reported higher pain scores at all time points versus those who went without.[*]

Another study (2006 JPOG) substantiates the above findings and also goes to on to provide data that women who received epidural analgesia not only had higher recollection of intense pain at two months and one year but also had greater difficulty forgetting pain 10 months later.[*]

If a mother chooses an epidural in most part to experience a labor that is less painful then one without anesthesia the data above can be sobering.

Research also suggests that pain experienced during labor is not entirely a negative experience, with more then 1 out of 4 women (28%) assessing pain as more of a positive than a negative – suggesting that coping with pain is a rewarding experience for some women.[*]



Lower Satisfaction Among Those Opting for Epidural Analgesia

Although women and care providers may assume that effective pharmaceutical pain relief during labor will ensure a more positive birth experience, there is mounting evidence that the opposite is true.

Several studies have shown that women who use no labor medication are the most satisfied with their labor and birth (times being assessed at time of birth, six weeks and one year after birth).[*][*][*][*][*][*]

Also worth noting, women who cope with labor using non-medical alternatives such as water birth, massage, positioning, focusing and breathing done with the support of another person report more satisfied than with standard pain relief given during childbirth.[*]

Natural techniques utilize a woman’s own strengths and places her in control of her own body. They also have been assessed to improve obstetric outcomes compared to pharmaceutical relief.[*][*] 

Interestingly, the influence of pain relief on satisfaction is not as powerful as the attitudes and behaviors of the mother and caregivers involved. Consider a 2002 study published in the American Journal of Obstetrics & Gynecology which concludes four factors that appear to override pain experienced in labor:[*][*]

1. Personal expectations
2. Amount of support from caregiver
3. Quality of caregiver-patient relationship
4. Mother’s involvement in decision making


This reaffirms the main key to satisfaction and managing labor pain effectively, is to ready yourself in advance – arranging continuous support, accurately understanding pain control options (and the interventions involved) and having an active role in the decision making process.[*][*]

****


As much as some might like to discount natural childbirth as a progressive trend among a small number of women, research affirms that women who opt for epidural anesthesia experience more pain, have a more difficult time forgetting the pain, and experience less satisfaction overall.  

Women do not decline an epidural simply to “win a medal” – instead information on different types of pain relief are assessed and balanced against other goals such as walking, pushing effectively, or minimizing maternal/neonatal side effects and/or risks.

How much of an effect an epidural medication can have on a newborn or mother is not easily predetermined and can vary based on dosage/mix of pharmaceutical drug combination, the length of labor, and each individual.[*]

Opting for an epidural anesthesia is one method (among many) that can aid in relief of pain and discomfort during the labor process. This type of pain relief requires a mother to give some control to the hospital staff. It does involve risk and additional intervention.

The decision, rightfully, rests for each woman to make. In due course, researching the procedure and talking others who have may be able to offer different perspectives could help a mother decide on what is right for them.

As the data suggests, most women who choose unmedicated birth (and prepare for it) find the pain intense but manageable and they are happier with their experience afterwards.


Ultimately, what can be said, each woman should use the insight into herself to be the best guideposts in directing her toward a positive decision regarding pain relief during labor.


"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience
 in which you really stop and look fear in the face."
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Witness to Normal Birth

It was about the best thing I ever experienced.
The minute she came out, I was born again. It was like we’d just been born together.


paper dolls photography

If you are privileged enough to have witnessed a woman giving birth naturally in a place she has chosen, what will you have seen?

You will first be in awe of her strength.
 
And you will think – for how could you not – what a phenomenal creature a woman is. But you will only have seen this astonishing sight if you have understood that if you disturb her in her work, she will be thrown off course. One must sit quietly and patiently, almost invisible, breathing with her, not disturbing her internal rhythm. And you will see that the pain of her labor seldom overwhelms her.

A deep significance to the mother, the momentous quality of pain, as she is surrounded by the deep sense of inwardness, forced to recognize her independence, her loneliness, selfhood, becoming conscious of her own existence. Paradoxically, this actual self-consciousness exposes a woman to her wholeness, her strengths and her endurance.

Nature would not have organized labor to be intolerable. It is the limits of our human understanding that wish to control all that is surveyed, that has conquered women by making them labor in the most tortuous environment constructed.

Let us bring them into harsh rooms with bright lights. Let us make them lie on their backs on hard narrow beds. Let us tether them to machines so they cannot move. Let us make them stay silent. Let us restriction their eating and drinking. Let us expose their most private parts and threaten them with cold steel. Let us make them push their babies upwards, against the pull of gravity. Let us monitor and measure and chart every move they make. Let us swab, wipe, prod, poke, irate, confuse and frighten them as much as we can.

In these conditions, labor swiftly becomes unbearable and pain relief becomes a woman’s only hope. Get me an epidural, cut it out of me, anything, make it stop. Please help me!

This is not the natural cry of a woman in labor bringing a child into the world, although if you have only ever witnessed labor and birth in a medicalized setting you might be inclined to think so. Her only hope for salvation lies in the anesthetist who numbs the pain or the obstetrician to remove it.


And a woman spoke, saying, Tell us of Pain.
And he said: Your pain is the breaking of the
shell that encloses your understanding.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that
it’s heart may stand in the sun
so must you know pain.
- Gibran




Altered passage and excerpts can be found in:

Normal Childbirth: Evidence and Debate. Chapter: The Role of Pain in Normal Birth and the Empowerment of Women (Nicky Leap and Tricia Anderson). Pages 25-39. 2004. http://readinglists.lib.monash.edu/items/5BB0FE73-9C52-D121-1760-8D2D7F4AACC9.html

Mommy Needs Wine

Mothers who unwind in the evening with a drink or two are definitely not alone.

Shoot, I was one of them. 62 days ago.

My personal reasons for completely abstaining from alcohol stem from my own childhood experiences with a parent who drank, my own addictive tendencies throughout life and a very intense passion inside me to be a better person.

My history with drinking was already sketchy to begin with; resulting in several run-ins with the law and one DUI at the ripe age of 21. Once I got pregnant, obviously, my drinking habits changed (as well as many other questionable habits like smoking and eating horribly).

After having two children fairly close together in time, I found myself free again to join my husband for a few drinks after work while cooking dinner and unwinding from the day.

Seems pretty ordinary, I guess… drinking is basically encouraged for parents (more on that a little later).

But I always found myself the next morning feeling a tinge of guilt. I would think to myself, “I could be a better mother if I just didn’t drink at all…”. What was holding me back? The routine…the effects of relief (both physically and mentally)…the encouragement from other women parading wine as completely acceptable?

I’m not saying that some moms aren’t absolutely fine with drinking 2 or 3 drinks a night. I just knew in my bones that I wasn’t one of them.

Then one day, I had it in me to choose something else other then drink a few glasses of wine. Just a random Thursday. Nothing special. That weekend, I started running and exercising to deal with any stress I had (I now run 5 nights a week).

My husband still drinks and thinks nothing of me choosing not to. I guess I can rack that up to me not having as big of a problem as I thought I might have had. I do imagine if I just went with the flow and waited a few more years, I probably wouldn’t have been able to stop the way I did. You see, the thing about addiction is it’s progressive.

I do find myself now more aware of the marketing toward moms (especially of young kids) and women in general…

Is being a mom so hard that a glass of wine (or two or three) is needed at the end of the day just to feel sane again?


I imagine alcohol producers are betting on it.

Have you heard these slogans yet???


"We All know that being a Mommy is a difficult job. A Mommy's Time Out is a well deserved break."

“Balanced, fruit-forward wines that bring just a bit of peace after the chaos of everyday life as a parent."


I’m definitely not condemning mothers who drink alcohol in a safe and appropriate manner, but in my experience, when someone says they’re drinking because they need stress relief that should be a red flag.

Drinking to cope with anything (the stresses of motherhood included), in my opinion, is not a skillful way of living a life. Yeah, it’s comical – to a point, and then it just becomes sad.

For some of us, we were simply given the example of damaging ways to cope with life by our parents – and so commences the beautiful masterpiece of life repeating itself.

I think the most powerful catalyst to stop the cycle of any destructive coping mechanism is the motivation to give your children a better parental model than you had growing up– at least that is what has provoked me to make, not just this change, but many changes in just the last 4 years.

How empowering and rewarding is it when you recognize that you are giving something of yourself that you never knew was in there?


I hope these words meet you in a place that sparks that desire in you -


“Don’t worry that children never listen to you;
worry that they are always watching you.”
- Robert Fulghum