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The Reality of Why I Choose to Share My Bed

I have written in the past on the benefits of cosleeping and the scientific evidence that supports the reasoning that in most cases it is the most beneficial arrangement to the child and family. (I say most, because if you’re a drug addict, smoker or obese then its probably not the best case scenario) 

But today I wanted to share a little bit of why it works for me personally.

Looking Past the Immense Benefits of CoSleeping – The Reality of Why I Choose to Share My Bed….

Waking Elizabeth up in the morning

1. I Value My Sleep Immeasurably.

I tend to get about an average of 8 hours of sleep during the weekdays (please take into consideration that I even wake up at to veg around and get ready in the mornings!)

… During the weekend I get about 10 hours of sleep, remember I have a near 2 year old in the house.

I have no doubt in my mind that sleeping with my whole family has contributed to this sleep pattern.

In the early years, I never even had to get out of bed when Elizabeth was a baby. My husband would change her diaper and bring her back to me. I would feed her and we would both doze off to dream land. Those infamous horror stories I was warned about pre-birth never perpetuated into reality.

I kind-of actually look forward to nights with my new baby who is due in just a few short months…

Here is an short reference to show that I’m not blowing smoke up everyone’s, umm……

“Every scientific study concludes that parents who bring their babies to
bed sleep longer and better.” [1]

2. It Makes Being Super Mom Really Easy

So, sometimes Elizabeth will wake up from a dead sleep into a frantic stage of panic. These times are very far and few between but I imagine it’s from a bad dream (someone stole her favorite green boots) or maybe it is because of the pain from those molars coming in all at once… but less then 5 seconds will elapse and she is soundly back to sleep. Shoot, I’m not even sure my husband wakes up.

There’s not even time for me to rip my shirt open to show the ‘S’ on my chest before we’re all back snoring.

I attribute my ninja-like reflexes in soothing my little lady to being in such close proximity to her. I know if she was sleeping in the other room it would take at least a minute for me to get my groggy ass up in the middle of the night … this is not even taking in consideration that she would have to at least cry or scream out for a bit to wake me or my husband up.

I can’t imagine how that feels to a small child being left alone in a dark room by themselves when they are frightened or feeling lonely. I know most adults don’t want to be alone when they are terrified or lonesome.

What can say, I love the immediate response time that I have to sooth my child and plus it gets me back to sleep quicker! 

Super Mom to the rescue!

3 Months Old, well rested mama

3. The Birth of a (Social) Butterfly

Let me preface this next reason with the reality that I personally have dealt with some real debilitating issues with anxiety in the past and my husband is not the most social individual on the planet. I can count both of our friends on one hand.

I do however try and set an example by greeting people when I walk into a room and of course giving my thanks when someone holds a door open for me. I do not, however, tell me daughter to say hello or thank you (since I feel she can say hello or thanks if she genuinely feels like it).

With that being said…

I see my daughter and it amazes me. She says hello and greets every single person we walk by at the grocery store, she says hello to the cars that drive by outside our house, she greets strangers like close friends. She has the confidence and self esteem of 50 adults.

I’ve read many, many studies proclaiming confidence and independence in young children that cosleep, but I am now fully entrenched with the fall out.

It’s amazing and it truly blows me away.

Here’s another short reference that I am evoked to share here:

“Children who share sleep with their parents are actually more independent than their peers. They perform better in school, have higher self esteem,
and fewer health problems.” [1]

4. Shhh, listen… I Think God is Talking.

I get vast satisfaction in listening to my daughter breathe at night and share in her warmth (she’s like a mini oven). I’m not sure if I need to go further in explanation here, but her breath and warmth is the closest I come to the Divine every day.

When I wake up in the middle of the night and I can’t go back to sleep right away, I lay there, snuggle close and listen.

What I hear and feel I cannot explain in words.

I am grateful to experience this while I can.

Happy Family of 4 (soon-to-be)

5. Unless I’m Over 50, The Bed is Not The Only Place For A Fun Time.

(no offense for people over 50)

Many people presume that because there is a child that sleeps in our bed that means that me and my husband don’t get to be intimate. I’m not going to get into too much detail here because I’m a lady and I don’t kiss and tell.

But if you didn’t catch on yet – I’m pregnant again…. So we haven’t had any issues in that department….

In fact, I feel that it is unfortunate that many people are only having relations in their bed. There are many other fun places to take part in the fun.

Jennifer Coburn is the author of Take Back Your Power: A Working Woman's Response to Sexual Harassment, which recently won an honorable mention from the National Women's Heritage Museum book awards and an Outstanding Book Award from the Myers Center for the Study of Human Rights in North America.

Here are some other articles on cosleeping that I enjoy.

4 Keller, Meret and Wendy Goldberg. ‘Co-Sleeping: Help or hinderance for young children’s indepence.” 14 Dec 2004.

Review: CJ's BUTTer

Toddler Stash of BumGenuis 4.0
I recently just started cloth diapering about a month ago. My daughter is 22 months old and it may seem a bit late … but I’ve been pushing and advocating for this since before she was born and it’s a small victory for me to say the very least. Plus I have one more one the way due in August, so that helped my argument as well.

I currently have 20 Bumgenius 4.0 pocket diapers and haven’t yet gone outside the box with trying anything other diapers then those. I have been eyeing the AIO Grovia diapers and have been wanting to try simple prefolds as well.

As you may be aware cloth diapers need a special cream for sore butts – if you use the regular ol’ cream the diapers will start to repel, and the last thing you want is a diaper that repels pee!

And so the search was on to find the best and safest cream out there….

And cue CJ’s BUTTer.

Easter Morning in Bumgenuis 4.0

But let’s back up here just for a sec.

I never have been a fan of the ol’Desitin or A&D creams. I remember reading something about how creams like these might not be the safest for babies. Have you ever read the ingredients in these?

The ingredients in Desitin are:

Zinc oxide40%
Cod Liver Oil

Here are the ingredients of concern in Desitin:

(toxicity level is rated from Skin Deep cosmetic safety database on a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most lethal)

(1) BHA(level 10 toxicity). BHA is associated with cancer and hormone disruption in numerous studies. And since it carries Skin Deep’s very highest toxicity level, standing for “high hazard”, this answers the question “safe or toxic” outright.  It has been banned from cosmetics in the EU because of skin dipigmentation.

(2) Fragrance(level 8 toxicity). Fragrance is a term that designates an undisclosed combination of ingredients that purportedly give the product a smell.  As such, it can hide the existence of virtually any dangerous chemical.  We do know that synthetic fragrance contains phthalates, which are hormone disrupting chemicals that are making there way into the urine of 81% of the infants tested.

(3) Methylparaben(level 4 toxicity) . Methylparaben is one of the parabens, the most widely used preservatives in cosmetics. Parabens are hormone disruptors, also called “endocrine disruptors”.   Studies listed on Skin Deep show that methylparaben has been shown to interfere with gene expression, cause mutation in vitro, have brain and nervous system effects at moderate doses, and cause skin irritation at low doses.

(4) Sodium borate(4-6 toxicity level, based on product usage). This ingredient found only in Desitin Creamy is specifically designated as unsafe by the cosmetics industry’s own safety panel!  It states that sodium borate “should not be used on infant skin or injured skin.” (CIR, p. 228).  It has virtually all of the dangerous effects of the above ingredients combined!

And now cue CJ’ BUTTer …

I needed something safe for cloth diapering (though we don’t see many diaper rashes I still wanted to have something on hand) and I was pretty interested in getting the opportunity to throw this Desitin out a moving vechile. 

I searched and CJ’s BUTTer seemed to be the first thing I came across. I was thrown off by all the rave reviews ( – it’s actually the highest rated product out of ALL products listed there) and thought something must be fishy. It’s never this easy to find exactly what you are looking for. But it was that easy!

I got the one on the far left. It's amazing

CJ’s BUTTer (from a WHAM company) comes in many forms. Tubes, tubs, sticks and sprays. I chose a 4 oz tube to start since I really didn’t have too high of expectations. They do have a HUGE list of different scents – I chose Love Spell – it smells just like the Love Spell from Victoria Secret!

There is a laundry list of uses for CJ’s BUTTer other just then plain ol’ rash prevention and healing….

chapped lips
raw irritated nose from a cold
rug burn on elbows and knees
shaving bumps
cracked heal/foot
eczema and dry skin

And CJ’s BUTTer is edible (although I don’t think it would taste particularly delicious) and is made with food grade ingredients. Which are:

Shea butter
Olive Oil
Coconut Oil (natural antibiotic and antiviral)
Cocoa butter
Vitamin E

I have to say, this is the first review I have ever posted. I’m glad it is for this product. It is seriously amazing! I ordered it from Sew Crafty Baby – she offers free (and fast!) shipping to the US and Canada.

They Have An App For That… I Mean A Vaccine For That

Vaccines Soon To Be At A Walgreens Near You !

Can’t Put Down That Tasty Cigarette? There’s a vaccine for that….

In 2009 the government announced that $10,000,000 of stimulus money would be used to fund a phase 3 clinical trial of a promising anti-smoking vaccine produced by Nabi Pharmaceuticals. [1]

Hate Those Pesky Grass Allergies? There’s a vaccine for that….

Yeah, that’s right, there are 5 pharmaceutical companies now in a race to be the first to develop a vaccine for your grass allergy. This is listed as a moderate priority for all five. [2]

Don’t forget about Alzheimer’s, no pun intended. There’s a vaccine for that…

Though a number of companies are working on an Alzheimer's vaccine, Cytos Biotechnology's Phase II CAD106 is the most advanced. AFFiRiS, Merck, Oklahoma Medical Research Foundation and United Biomedical are all pursuing an Alzheimer's vaccine, which could have a potential market of $1.15 billion by 2020. [2]

 Don’t have to worry about super bacteria any longer! There’s a vaccine for that…

Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus is a bacterium responsible for several difficult-to-treat infections in humans. It is often contracted in hospital settings and is extremely hard to treat, even with powerful antibiotics. Kalorama notes that more people in the U.S. die from MRSA infections than HIV/AIDS, emphysema or homicide. Merck has a Phase II product in the works for MRSA, while GSK's PentaStaph vaccine is in Phase I testing. 2020 sales are estimated to hit $650 million. [2]

Forget a Cure for Multiple Sclerosis, There’s a vaccine for that…

MS is an autoimmune diseases in which the immune system attacks the brain and spinal cord. It’s pretty ironic that there is going to be a vaccine for an auto-immune disorder since I can’t see it in anyway benefiting these people. Approximately 5 million people worldwide suffer from the disease, which causes muscle problems and a wide range of neurological issues. Bayhill Therapeutics' BHT-3009 and Opexa Therapeutics' Tovaxin and both in Phase II trials. The 2020 MS vaccine market could hit $1.1 billion. [2]

High Blood Pressure? Don’t worry, you don’t have to put down that salt shaker or your frosty cold beer. There’s a vaccine for that…

Hypertension, or high blood pressure, would represent a $2.4 billion vaccine market by 2020. Cytos Biotechnology's CYT006-AngQb and an unnamed drug from Protherics are both in Phase II for the disease. [2]

Can’t Abstain From Risky Sexual and Drug Behaviors? Don’t have to worry about AIDS, There’s a vaccine for that…

Vaccine researchers don’t often find themselves at the center of public controversies. But a storm has erupted over the announcement that an experimental AIDS vaccine tested in Thailand proved modestly effective. It was billed as a major scientific advance — the long-awaited hard evidence that it is possible to inoculate people against AIDS. But now the trial has been called into question in a way that is overblown and possibly destructive! [3]

Too Fat? Can’t Stop Eat Wendy’s Double Cheeseburgers? There’s a vaccine for that….
Although obesity is primarily linked to eating too many calories or burning too few, other factors may play a role, from lack of sleep to changes in stomach bacteria and now a common cold virus. Scientists in Louisiana showed that infection with human adenovirus–36 (Ad–36), long known as a cause of colds and eye infections, transformed adult stem cells obtained from fat tissue into fat cells. [4]