5 Useless Medical Practices Used On Children

Caring for children comes naturally and adults have been caring for children for as long as our species has been around, but the discipline of pediatrics emerged just barely a century ago. The emergence of pediatrics as a specialty in medicine was merely one example of a broader trend we have experienced in institutional medicine…

It would seem that we have come a long way in our advances in pediatrics (and in medicine in general)– however, many of the common procedures in use today in children are not as useful as we are led to believe...

Tympanostomy Tubes

Tympanostomy tubes are what a doctor might describe to parents as ear tubes. Their main purpose: ventilation in the hopes to prevent the accumulation of fluid in the ear that might possibly cause hearing loss.

The average age for ear tube insertion is only 12 months to three years old. In many case, younger than a year old.

Over 700,000 lucky infants and toddlers get the honor to undergo general anesthesia and have their ears sliced open.

This is exactly what tympanostomy tubes look like

The million dollar question is: Do inserting tubes in the ear help with hearing loss or future risk of ear infections?

Parents are warned that if fluid in the middle ear loiters around due to reoccurring ear infections, it holds a possibly that it could impair hearing loss and even cause problems with speech..possibly learning.

What watchful and caring parent would not want to prevent such devastating consequences when it could be avoided??

Literature and studies over several decades illustrate no such evidence, in fact, a few studies have confirmed that those with ear tubes suffer greater damage to their eardrums. Some even have poorer hearing after the tubes were removed. Say Wha?!

WTF

Just to recap again - there is little to no evidence of a significant relationship between a history of ear infections and children’s academic skills in the future.

Even the American Academy of Pediatrics found that the steady increase in tympanostomy tube procedures to be a bit fishy. In 2004, they published updated clinical guidelines, written to avoid unneeded surgery, emphasizing that the problem usually resolves itself within three  months without the surgery. 

Still, this impractical procedure is still being pushed on unsuspecting parents and their children. Of course there are severe circumstances in which it can be benefical, however, every case should be examined closely.

Instead of placing plastic tubes in little ones ears, how about doctors start by educating parents early on to avoid ear infections as best they can in the first place? Is that too logical? I don’t get it. Here, I’ve done some reading for them:

-Don’t feed babies bottles lying down

-Don’t let people smoke around the baby (duh)

-Ear infections are mostly secondary to the common cold – practice good hygiene and wash your damn hands and cover your mouth when you cough

-Breastfeed for as long as possible

Water Fluorination

Yes – fluoride purposely placed in your water supply for the sole purpose of medicating the population (particularly children) in preventing cavities is absolutely ridiculous. Especially when there are easy available alternatives to prevent cavities, such as – yup, you guessed it – a toothbrush!

Cats love licking toothbrushes with their dirty ass tongues and
putting their paws covered in liter in glasses of water.

The fluoride used for water fluoridation does not have FDA approval and is considered an "unapproved drug".

In fact, fluoridated water is no longer recommended for babies (yes, you read that right). In November of 2006, the American Dental Association (ADA) advised that parents should avoid giving babies and infants fluoridated water.

Umm, then why are we still doing this? AND PAYING FOR IT!?

When water fluoridation began in the 1940s and '50s, dentists believed that fluoride needed to be swallowed in order to be most effective. This belief, however, has now been discredited by an extensive body of modern research. Fluoride has a minimal benefit when swallowed, while carrying the possibility of many risks.

Risks Include:

BRAIN DAMAGE- The National Research Council states that fluoride can damage the brain and can cause dementia-like effects (at the same concentration used to fluoridate water). Yikes! Also adverse effects on IQ among children have been documented.

THYRIOD. DAMAGE- Did you know that fluoride is an endocrine disrupter. What does that mean exactly - well it means that drinking fluoridated water may reduce the function of the thyroid – which can lead to loss of mental acuity, weight gain and depression. What a downer.

SPECIAL CONCERN FOR KIDNEY PATIENTS- The deal with mass fluorination is that water does not discriminate- People with kidney problems have a heightened susceptibility to fluoride toxicity. As a result, drinking water that contains fluoride can accumulate in the bones and cause a painful bone disease (renal osteodystrophy) in kidney disease patients.

A much more common and increasingly prone problem specifically within children is dental fluorosis which is caused by the ingestion of fluoride.

What does fluorosis look like? Well, it isn’t all that pretty. The enamel may be pitted, rough and especially difficult to clean. The spots and stains left by fluorosis are PERMANANT and may darken over time. Neat huh?

this is a picture of what Steve looked like before
ingesting flouride

One of the main arguments by those advocating water fluoridation is that it’s needed because it helps poor kids. But according to the Surgeon General in 2000, approximately 80 percent of children on goverment assistance (Medicaid) don’t receive any dental care because dentists don’t accept Medicaid Insurance.

Perhaps we could use the money used to pay to fluoridate our water supply to subsidize dental care for children? Hmmm…. oh, that’s just silly.

Circumcision

THE most common surgical procedure in the country is oddly not recommend or endorsed by any known medical organization on the planet Earth (however I’ve heard it’s mandatory on Uranus, Neptune and the northern factions of Pluto).

Neptune and Uranus are much more larger then Earth
which makes them right

Nonetheless, dozens of studies confirm the extreme pain of circumcision.  It has been labeled as among the most painful procedures performed in neonatal medicine.

Circumcision doesn’t cure anything; in fact it is a procedure in search of a disease…

Diseases that circumcision has purportedly touted to cure among the last several decades range from masturbation (I’m not sure if this is considered a disease, rather its just iicky and boys should never touch wieners), epilepsy, schizophrenia, urinary tract infections, and cancer.

None of these have held up to scientific scrutiny.  

Overall, despite all of the medical literature, the popularity of the procedure rests on the idea of conformity.

don't be a cracker-jack

Isn’t that what we’re all about anyways? People that are unique are weirdos anyways.

Well-Child Visits

The first schedule for preventive child health care was created in the mid sixities by the Council on Pediatric Practice.  We’ve come so far from then…

The schedule since then has been modified many, many, many, many times – leading for moms and dads to have many opportunities to play Russian Roulette with their healthy newborn infants in the infested waiting rooms of doctor’s offices across the nation in hopes to learn how long their baby is.

here, let me spit in your mouth while I rub your face on my ass

Don’t get me wrong – the development and growth in the early months and years of children should be monitored in some way. However, quality of care outlined in each “well-baby” visit is greatly unimpressive.

Do you realize that nearly half of pediatricians agree there is sufficient time to perform developmental assessments in these visits?

Shoot – I can measure and weigh my baby in the safety of my own house. And those percentiles? What a joke. They only lend themselves as bragging rights for parents – “Little Timmy is in the 70% percentile” – “Oh, really, well little Annie is in the 150^th percentile, bitch.”

No, I have the biggest head, damn it.

There is a pressing need for better, more rational, and scientifically guided preventative care for children. In fact, there is very little research on the effectiveness of preventative pediatric care.

The current system is flailing. Trying harder will not work – changing systems of care will. Pediatricians cannot squeeze more into what limited time they are already working with.  

Developmental and behavioral problems of all types seem to be increasing AND occurring at younger ages – evidence that simply providing more as the same is not helping our children. The current approach to well-child care is inadequate and stands as a barrier to effective care.

Should you forego well-child visits all together? If you do, then you would be a part of an increasing lot of parents that question the value in them. The low rateof attendance at well-child visits is alarming pediatricians – but rather should be shown as evidence of a system of care that needs overhauled.

Antibiotics

This isn’t a surprise, is it? Did you know that we are reaching an estimate of near half the time a child pays his or her doctor a visit they will leave with a prescription for antibiotics?! This includes sick visits AND routine well-child check-ups!

Antibiotics were an astounding advancement in the treatment of bacterial diseases, now it seems that doctors are prescribing them more and more for viral illness  (“just to be on the safe side”).

Didn't years in medical school teach them antibiotics aren't effective on a virus?

Doctors may be under the impression that children get better faster with antibiotics –research illustrates this is simply not true. Then throw in the fact that antibiotics carry very real side effects….PLUS, children are much more likely to suffer from those side effects such as diarrhea and abdominal pain (caused by the complete extermination of healthy flora in the gut).

Excuse me while I take my 5th dump this morning

The reckless practice of making it rain with antibiotics is harmful to children and to the environment. Children may seem to get better a bit quicker at first but they are also more likely to get sick more often.

Nate Dogg would appreciate this picture

Here is something to arm yourself with the next time you take your child to the doctor – one simple sentence, “Is there any way to safely make my son/daughter feel better without antibiotics?”.

Let us take an active role in our children’s health.

Here is somewhere to learn more: Dr. Mendelsohn’s How To Raise A Healthy Child in Spite of Your Doctor.

Do you have any medical procedures that you think should be added to the list?

Sources

Edward L. Schor, MD. Rethinking Well-Child Care. Neoreviews (Official Journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics). Vol 114, No 1. July 2004

10 Facts about Fluoride. Fluoride Action Network Website